Some years ago on the Mary Tyler Moore show they had a segment where Lou Grant's wife decided to leave him and their marriage of some years. It was a sign of the times. She says: "I am sorry Lou, but I was very young when I married you and did not know much. I want to go out on my own now and find out Who I really am..." What nonsense. By leaving for such a fatuous reason she was proving who she really was - a fair weather, uncommitted spouse who instead of being loyal, faithful, and enduring, has decided to pursue another wholly selfish path.
We often hear people say "I want to find out who I really am.." as if there was some magic formula that established identity for each of us. The fact is that each of us is born the son or daughter of our parents. We have unlimited possibilities. Some of what we are will be determined by our upbringing and our innate personality, but we are not born with an identity that cannot be changed by our thinking and our conduct. Many have had poor parenting and bad upbringing only to overcome it by their thinking and conduct. The contrary is also true. This is based on personal choice and conduct. We can change. That is the central message of Christ - whatever you are now you can change for the better. We are after all, what our thinking and conduct makes us. "As a man thinketh, so is he." "The thought is the father of the act." We can change our thinking and control it such that our conduct will improve for the better.
Too often, giving in to an identity that we have created for ourselves by our thinking and our conduct is an easy excuse for the criminal, the unfaithful, the immoral and the uncommitted. We all tend to justify ourselves and what we do in our own minds. Thus, bad conduct can be justified by simply saying to ones self -" well that is just the way I am. Maybe I was born that way. I cannot change it because other forces have determined the way I conduct myself." This is the devil speaking. There will be no repentance or change of conduct so long as we give in to the false premise that we have an identity that cannot be changed.
So let us not forget WHO we are. The product of good teaching, good example, and good thinking on our part. That identity is a product of how we live and have lived; how we think and have thought; how we act and have acted. You are in control and do not let anyone tell you otherwise.
9 comments:
Wow! That was one powerful missive. We want to post it on our website permanently, if that's ok. We will give you credit as author, but will not give out your blog address. So well put, and every word essential.
Dad-Your wisdom is profound. Thank you so much for blogging and leaving such wonderful advise to generations to come!
Good point Grandpa. Have you read the Conference Ensign? They published a talk that President Faust wrote a few months ago talking about change, and if you have the desire and Christ, then absolutely ANYTHING is possible. It is true. Life isn't easy at all times, and running away from things isn't the answer. Turning to Christ is.
True and true again! It would be easy for me to say I lose my temper because that's just the way I am, but how would that be fair to my family and those around me? Each of those moments when my temper flares is a chance for me to learn patience. We are here to learn, and learn under the circumstances we are given.
This is great. I sent copies of all your who-what-where blogs to Drew. He will love them.
I never have liked the phrase "That's just the way I am". It seems so hard headed. I sometimes find myself acting like I always know what's best for me, but it's rarely true. I want to be teachable and improve myself. That's why we have trials after all. We better take advantage of them. Thanks Grandpa.
G-pa,
AMEN! You have a clarity of thought and writing that is truly a gift. Keep writing!
I look forward to reading about your experience in the War and hope to share that with my boys. They will fight someday and will need all the strength they can muster...your writings will give them something to remember and rely on when those hard times come.
CLINT
I love reading your words of wisdom. We all have so much to learn from you. Thank you for all you have taught as and continue to teach us! You are a wonderful example!
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